This morning I was telling the squirrels in my front yard about my cat Lillekatt and about how she was a “yelly belly”… then of course I had to explain about Jelly Belly candy and the pun and then I thought, “Why am I explaining a dad joke to these squirrels? They just want some peanuts and corn.”
Then I thought, “Why am I talking to squirrels?”
It’s eight months now in solitary confinement in my house now and I am LOSING MY DAMN MIND. Thing is, I’ve always been able to entertain myself in the past. I have my online teaching (such as it is), and I wrote some proposals for next semester, and I have D&D three times a month, and my drawing, and music, and of course there are infinite K-Dramas to watch and I just got “Just Dance 2020” on the Playstation and I have Persona5Royal and I have DIY and housework and sewing and gardening and potting plants and ceramics…
…okay mostly I spend the days sprawled on the sofa, staring at the ceiling, and eating whatever is nearest to hand.
I have either Korean Netflix shows (Busted!, anyone?), Rifftrax reruns or the OnlyMXC Twitch stream (don’t judge me) on almost 24/7 just so there is the sound of human voices without the upsetting news, complaining, fear mongering or arguing that seems to saturate on all American media. My election week consisted of nauseated staring at the electoral map as my eyeballs slowly shriveled up.
Today I woke up at 6 am, fed the cats and squirrels and birds, did work for my pharm class until 9 am, exercised (i.e. danced around like a weirdo to K-Pop) for an hour, read some emails, ordered some potting soil online, watched some Korean variety show YouTubes until noon, folded laundry, showered, drove to Oakton to glaze a ceramic pot I made in March that was not an emergency but I had to get out of the house because omg I was talking to squirrels and I had to get out of the house, and… now I’m home writing this tripe.
I’m pretty well off and have the means to keep myself occupied despite my kvetching; I expect the reason we are in such a mess that other countries won’t let Americans visit is because everyone else is equally bonkers. And I just want to give anyone who is SO BORED that they are reading this sentence a huge hug and tell them to hang in there. Because OMG this sucks.
I mean look at my squirrels. They’re all going to get diabetes from me having nothing to do but feed them. This is one of the scrawnier ones who dropped by today at 4pm to scavenge around the base of the bird feeder.
One of the skinny squirrels that visits my yard… most of the alpha squirrels look like furry softballs…
Yeah… I know I basically have these guys for life now as pets as they are likely getting dependent on me for food. Most mornings there is one fellow waiting for me, staring hopefully into the window with big brown eyes. I even have people come to feed the birds and squirrels if I leave town; my friend Jessica said she felt like Snow White when the animals all surrounded her during visits.
This is why I always wear a ballgown and tiara nowadays… but that’s a different story.
Ah well. The sun is going down so… blehhh… I’m going to go study some Korean - because why not - and then I have office hours that no students will come to because they never do - and then I’ll go take a bath I guess and watch some Korean variety shows and review some Korean because Korean is my anti-drug for 2020. Don’t judge me.
Argh, this is worse than when I was first disabled because at least back then I had all the depression and pain and vomiting to keep me occupied.
In his book The Conquest of Happiness, Bertrand Russell wrote that - barring terrible tragedy - the main cause of unhappiness was boredom.
You said it, brother.
Non-English Word of the Day:
English: Yum!
Norwegian: Nam!
Korean: 냠! Nyam!
… I don’t know the squirrel word for "Yum"… yet.